Tuesday, May 26, 2009

I Know What You Want

Dear Bloggers,

Do you know what saying really aggravates me? The “I’m not the average girl” quote, just hearing girls say that makes my skin crawl. Why, you might ask? Because it lends itself to the bigger question of: What is the average girl? Does her room look like “Build-A-Bear” vomited in it? Do her outfits usually contain multiple versions of the color pink? Has she been planning her wedding since she was seven years old? Is her main goal in life is to fall in love and have children? Is she void of intellectual thought, and can only talk about fashion and makeup?

The reason why this “average girl” saying bugs me is because it seems to reinforce how men see women. It seems as though guys think that every girl has this insanely loud biological clock that’s ticking, and the only thing that’s on her mind is falling in love, getting married and having children. Every single guy I’ve dated has made a comment about what they THOUGHT I wanted, when it was completely opposite than my true desires.

Now, don’t get me wrong, there are those… girls… that seem to want to fall in love so bad. She spends her time watching those nauseating romantic comedies (“Forget Paris,” and “When Harry Met Sally” are not included, those movies are AMAZING), and hope to have a relationship just like the protagonists in those movies. However, I would think that these movie-recreators make up a small population of women. But still, why do they seem to be the landmark that men measure ALL women to?

I have two sisters that are married. My sister’s husband, Watson, is known among people as the “King of Cake.” (For those not familiar with the colloquialism of “Cake” it is an expression that signifies when a man and a woman are showing affection for each other.) Watson and Kelli express their love anywhere they possibly can, and especially in the realm of Facebook. One year, a couple of Watson’s friends and myself were trash talking Watson about his Cake status while my boyfriend walked into my room. Asking me why I was laughing, I explained to him about my awesome comment to Watson and being such a cheeseball. My ex looked at me, rubbed my hair, and said: “It’s funny when people make fun of other people when it’s something that they secretly want.”

“Ummm… excuse me?!” He just walked away with a smug grin on his face as if he had pinpointed my deepest desires. No matter how my actions proved that that type of open affection made me uncomfortable, it didn’t matter. According to my ex “that’s what ALL girls want.” When in actuality, all I wanted HIM to do is start picking up the bill sometimes when we went to dinner, not propose!!

So to you, wonderful readers, every woman does not have a wedding dress hiding in her closet, or has her perfect ring picked out. Not every woman’s biological clock is ticking, and honestly, I don’t even know if I HAVE a clock. But what I do have is a lack of tolerance for having this “average girl” status put on me and other women.


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