Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Spitting Distance

Dear Bloggers,

What type of person would you consider to be naive? Would you consider a small child, whose trying to deal with the bad decisions of others by trying to make her world a better place? A person who separates herself from her family and tries to create her own by making a new family with friendship. Is she naive? YES!!

Like I've said before, it took me years to deal overcome the hurt that was put on me by some family members. Because I thought in my small, child-like mind that no one in my family could be trusted, that left me without a support system. So, at that time, I tried to create my own family with friendships. The problem was, some of those "friends" were open enemies, I was just too naive to accept it.

A group of girls who did not like my sisters and I came up to me one day on my front lawn. My sisters were in the house, and they always warned me against the girls. I figured that out of the two groups, I would trust these girls over my sisters. They asked me where my sisters where. When I told them they were inside, they then all took hand fulls of ranch flavored sunflower seeds. They asked me if I wanted any, and I jumped up from our stairs to get some. The wind blew through my pigtails and I put my hand out to receive these seeds that I thought were so symbolic of a blossoming friendship. Then...

They SPIT THE SUNFLOWER SEEDS IN MY FACE!!!!!! .....Yeah, I'm gonna let you read that one again.

I stood there stunned, as they ran away. It was as if all I was frozen in surprise. All of the sound became muted. I could no longer hear the wind rustling the leaves of the trees. I could feel my legs itch due to my dry skin. The only thing I could feel was the sunflower seeds and saliva sliding off my face.

I felt sickened, and very embarrassed, thinking that no matter what I would do in life, I would never find a group of people that I trusted.

As I've gotten older, I've gotten tougher, and less naive. I've learned that not everyone can be trusted, and not everyone is looking to hurt me. I have a group of friends and family that I finally have trust, and love with. Even when we're physically apart, they always feel like they're a spit distance away.


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